


Not Yet

by CinnaStarks



Series: Inquisitor Izuna [4]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Blood, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Drowning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-02
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-03-10 05:08:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3277874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CinnaStarks/pseuds/CinnaStarks
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He doesn't want to leave. Not yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Yet

The first coherent thought that rushes through Cullen’s mind after his loft collapses isn’t related to the pain. Even as splinters from both his bones and the wood that gave out from beneath his feet pierce his flesh, his mind manages to scream something different.

_Not yet. Not while she’s away._

And then it goes silent. Templar or not, Cullen trained as a warrior. Physical pain isn’t a foreign concept, but _this_ degree is something that none of his experience could have prepared him for. He tries to scream. Blood stains his lips. Every breath sends fire through his veins. His mind speaks up again.

_I don’t want to leave this world. Not after I’ve finally found-_

“Commander!” A familiar voice cuts through his thoughts. Its source, a flurry of leather and silverite, enters his vision. “Cole, get Vivienne and the surgeon. Now!” The command is followed by a string of Tevene curses that Cullen has only heard in passing. “Didn’t she tell you that this tower wasn’t safe?”

It hurts worse than the splinters.

Dorian knows. “Of course she did.” Through bleary eyes, Cullen can make out his grimace.

“Don’t-“ Even if the word is softer than a whisper, it feels like a dagger being driven through his lungs. Still, he has to get this out. He has to make sure that there’s still hope. “-let me-”

Another Tevene curse echoes across the room before a bright, green light flashes before his eyes. The blood that has been crawling up Cullen’s throat slows to a halt. “I will not let my-“ Dorian’s voice catches. “-friend die like this.” Through the pain, he can feel one of the mage’s hands grasping one of his own. Another pulse of green floods his vision. The pain becomes less severe. “Not when he has found something that I abandoned my homeland for.” Their hands are wet. “I just wouldn’t be able to live with myself if you went somewhere the Inquisitor could not follow.”

Pain is not the only thing that is beginning to leave his body. He can barely feel the second tear that falls upon their hands. “Ordering me?” Cullen cannot feel his lips moving or hear the words he speaks, but he knows that they are there. His eyelids become heavier with every breath he takes.

“Not to die?” Darkness finds him, but he can still Dorian through its dense haze. “Yes, I suppose I am.”

Cullen sinks.

When he was young, the pond behind his childhood home came close to taking him early. He always loved swimming, but his parents knew better than to let an eight year old boy play in the water without supervision. That never stopped him from trying, though. Most of the time, he was caught. The moment that he made it to the middle of the pond without someone shouting at him to get out was one that filled him with joy. Too bad it lasted only a few seconds before his energy gave out.

More than twenty years later, he feels as if the pond is stealing him away again. He cannot fight the peace that has taken over his body, only wait as the world continues to turn without him. Faint voices touch his consciousness, but the words fail to make sense. They are just meaningless sounds, ripples in the water that surrounds him.

Until she speaks.

_Maker, I don’t know if you can hear me or if you would listen to an elf’s prayer, but please try._

She sounds tired.

_Do not take him into your arms. The Inquisition needs him._

A sob echoes across Cullen’s consciousness.

_I need him._

For the first time since succumbing to the darkness, he has the urge to fight against the peace. He wants to open his eyes. He wants to wipe the tears off of her tattooed cheeks. He wants-

_Cullen? Did you just-_

He hears the sound of something being knocked over. Footsteps.

_His fingers twitched! He moved!_

She is happy. Inquisitor Izuna Lavellan is happy. The thought of it makes Cullen fight harder. It’s like swimming through muck, but every inch he gains is another inch closer to breathing again. The voices become less frequent after a while and yet he does not stop. He can’t. He can’t leave her. Not toda-

Cullen Rutherford opens his eyes to meet the last ones he saw before drifting away. The face is clearer and brighter in the light shining through the infirmary’s window, but no less worried. Still, a smile spreads across it. “It’s good to know that our dear Commander can still follow orders.” Dorian says. “And, before you ask what happened, I must apologize for not asking your permission before slowing your heartbeat down to almost nothing while we saved your life. There’s not really time for formalities when you’re in that kind of situation.” He’s talking too much and, from the way his eyes dart about the room, he knows it.

“Thank you-“ He knows he can move, but there is no need to. “-my friend.”

Just as he had done before, Dorian takes Cullen’s hand in his. The mage’s eyes are glassy. “It was my pleasure, Cullen.”

 

 

 

 


End file.
